Responsibility

This topic will probably come in several different forms.  However, this one only deals with the ladies perspective.  So don't start off by saying "what the guy should do" as in this case it doesn't matter.  We are only talking about what we as women should or should not take responsibility for.

So, I was listening to Steve Harvey on Friday morning.  There was a young lady on the air who got pregnant by a man who she knew had no intentions of being with her.  She knew that she was only a friend with benefit and in the beginning she agreed to this arrangement.  She at some point (maybe in the beginning) had feelings for this man.  So, she gets pregnant.  My question is, should she expect this man to support his child emotionally and/or financially?  She claims to no longer be interested in him, but wants him to have a relationship with his child.  A child by the way that he had no say so in the creation and did not want.  What are we teaching our daughters?  Is it ok to trap a man and then expect him to play daddy?  Should he not have a say so in whether or not he brings a life into the world?  If a woman gets pregnant without her partners permission and on purpose in hopes of trapping him, should she be prepared to except the ultimate consequence of him not wanting or participating in the life of this child?

Will look at the other side later on in the week.

Responsibility

This topic will probably come in several different forms.  However, this one only deals with the ladies perspective.  So don't start off by saying "what the guy should do" as in this case it doesn't matter.  We are only talking about what we as women should or should not take responsibility for.

So, I was listening to Steve Harvey on Friday morning.  There was a young lady on the air who got pregnant by a man who she knew had no intentions of being with her.  She knew that she was only a friend with benefit and in the beginning she agreed to this arrangement.  She at some point (maybe in the beginning) had feelings for this man.  So, she gets pregnant.  My question is, should she expect this man to support his child emotionally and/or financially?  She claims to no longer be interested in him, but wants him to have a relationship with his child.  A child by the way that he had no say so in the creation and did not want.  What are we teaching our daughters?  Is it ok to trap a man and then expect him to play daddy?  Should he not have a say so in whether or not he brings a life into the world?  If a woman gets pregnant without her partners permission and on purpose in hopes of trapping him, should she be prepared to except the ultimate consequence of him not wanting or participating in the life of this child?

Will look at the other side later on in the week.

Can cheating in "the marital bed" be forgiven?

This was a topic on the Today Show this morning and I just couldn't resist weighing in.  I will first say this ~   I have been cheated on (as most of have) and I have been cheated with (as some of us have if we are truly honest).  Cheating is a topic that women discuss often and some what hypocritically (will save that for another day). 

The thing I noted most from the conversation on the Today Show was something my grandmother has spoken of often ~ and that is cheating can be done with integrity.  Go figure.  I do have to wonder though if we call it cheating with integrity because it allows us to forgive and continue in the relationship?  I know that for me I believe all men and most women cheat at some point for various reasons.  Does this allow us to rationalize certain behaviors?  But I do have to agree and it is because I agree that I don't believe that cheating in the marital bed can be forgiven.  Honestly, I don't believe cheating under the roof you live in with your spouse, partner, significant other etc. can be forgiven.  I am not even sure if I believe that when you are just dating that cheating at the house can be forgiven.  But back to the integrity thing.  I absolutely believe that cheating can be done with integrity.  I also believe that everyone should play their position (another topic for another day).

Curious....do you all think that cheating in the marital bed can be forgiven?  How many times have you forgive someone for cheating?  Do you think it is easier for women to forgive than men? 

How Quickly We Forget!

I have seen this numerous times, but just had to post it as it is so true!!!

There was a blind girl who hated herself because she was blind. She hated everyone, except her loving boyfriend. He was always there for her. She told her boyfriend, 'If I could only see the world, I will marry you.'

One day, someone donated a pair of eyes to her. When the bandages came off, she was able to see everything, including her boyfriend.

He asked her, 'Now that you can see the world, will you marry me?' The girl looked at her boyfriend and saw that he was blind. The sight of his closed
eyelids shocked her. She hadn't expected that. The thought of looking at them the rest of her life led her to refuse to marry him.

Her boyfriend left in tears and days later wrote a note to her saying: 'Take good care of your eyes, my dear, for before they were yours, they were mine..' This is how the human brain often works when our status changes. Only a very few remember what life was like before, and who

was always by their side in the most painful situations.

Life Is a Gift

Today before you say an unkind word - Think of someone who can't speak.

Before you complain about the taste of your food - Think of someone who has nothing to eat.

Before you complain about your husband or wife - Think of someone who's crying out to GOD for a companion.

Today before you complain about life - Think of someone who went too early to heaven.

Before whining about the distance you drive Think of someone who walks the same distance with their feet.

And when you are tired and complain about your job - Think of the unemployed, the disabled, and those who wish they had your job.

And when depressing thoughts seem to get you down - Put a smile on your face and think: you're alive and still around.

Rapist In Your Neighborhood

I was watching Lifetime this morning at about 2:00 a.m.  Don't ask!  This movie was on about a rapist moving into this small community.  Evidently was a fairly old movie because at the end it stated that only 16 states required reporting of sex offenders moving in a neighborhood.  I think that number is a lot larger now.

Anyway, the rapist moves into the neighborhood his brother lives in.  The people in the town go crazy.  They have this town meeting demanding that he not be allowed to move there.  The brother stands up and reminds them that they all attend church together and that God calls for forgiveness.  Of course they didn't want to hear it and as soon as someone is raped they blame him.  He didn't do it.  They kill his dog.  And eventually he leaves the neighborhood.

I began to question myself.  How would I react if a rapist moved in my neighborhood (although there probably is one, I just don't know it).  Would my Christian Principals and Values step in?  Could I forgive and offer redemption?  Would I stereotype him?  Does it matter if he raped one person or 10.  How can I be a true Christian if I couldn't forgive or at least treat him normally?  Does it matter that sex offenders have a high recidivism rate?  Should it matter?  Am I a hypocrit if I expect forgiveness and second chances, but can't give them? 

What are your thoughts?

Follower

Yea!  I have a follower!  Katasha inbox me your mailing address.  Going to send you something special for making me feel special!

My Princess Boy

This morning while getting ready I was watching the Today Show as always and caught the segment about "My Princess Boy."  I was so amazed, awe struck and admiring of a woman who is accepting her son as he is.  He is four years old and likes to dress as a girl.  She stated that she was having difficulty with it until her older said "why can't you let him be happy."  Those words were so amazing and powerful to me!  Out of the mouths of babes.  Her son will probably grow up happy, healthy and most importantly knowing he is loved.  I remember reading E. Lynn Harris' memoirs and the amount of time he spent talking about how he worried if he his family and friends would still love him if he were gay.  That has to be a lonely and fearful existence.  Acceptance is a wonderful thing.  Could you accept this of your son?  Could I?  Honestly, I don't know.  I can say I hope I don't have too.  (What does that statement say about me?)  I know lots of gay people and love them dearly.  But do I want that for my son?  Does any parent?  Love and acceptance is the most important thing though no matter what.  Kudos to she, her family and her "Princess Boy."